what is this feeling,
when your heart is in pain?
it won't go away..
it stays in place taunting your heart.
the pounding gets harder,
hurting my rib cage.
my mind keeps racing to that one person,
cant stop thinking about him.
as i make a wish,
my eyes fill up with tears.
i just need a connection,
just one more chance to hear his voice,
to see his face.
his dimpled smile.
but now he is with someone else,
i didn't have a chance to tell him...
i love him <3
This is an open book of my expressions, life, and problems. You are taking part of my journey through life. Some of the poems and stories I write are true.
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Saturday, May 16, 2009
The Three Magic Words
The secret I have on the tip of my tongue,
The secret I have in the middle of you and me.
The lies that float in your head,
The lies that spill out over me.
The thoughts that keep repeating,
The thoughts that never slip away.
Just ask the truth you want,
The word or phrase that is the answer.
The peace maker of the start,
Just ask me to follow us.
Just tell me you love me,
Three magic little words.
The secret I have in the middle of you and me.
The lies that float in your head,
The lies that spill out over me.
The thoughts that keep repeating,
The thoughts that never slip away.
Just ask the truth you want,
The word or phrase that is the answer.
The peace maker of the start,
Just ask me to follow us.
Just tell me you love me,
Three magic little words.
Coming back
We lost each other over the summer,
Not knowing what street to take.
The signs keep hitting you in the face,
But they are telling you to not follow.
I've never spent this much time away from you,
But the clock keeps ticking by.
Until I get it right,
I need to fast forward.
I've never felt this way before,
The lies ware off.
As I realize the truth,
I need to stop the haze.
I shouldn't keep this from you,
The positive and the negative.
Even if you might turn around,
That maybe you'll come back.
But now we're back in the fall,
The fall we took in the summer collided.
Now the secrets hidden on my lips are opening,
Now that I have you.
Not knowing what street to take.
The signs keep hitting you in the face,
But they are telling you to not follow.
I've never spent this much time away from you,
But the clock keeps ticking by.
Until I get it right,
I need to fast forward.
I've never felt this way before,
The lies ware off.
As I realize the truth,
I need to stop the haze.
I shouldn't keep this from you,
The positive and the negative.
Even if you might turn around,
That maybe you'll come back.
But now we're back in the fall,
The fall we took in the summer collided.
Now the secrets hidden on my lips are opening,
Now that I have you.
Sunday, May 10, 2009
I sit on the couch,
with my head thrown back.
I sigh with contentment,
from the scene thats before me.
You and Me..
You sit there next to me,
holding my hand.
I look up at you,
and smile.
You look down and smile back.
You get up,
and leave me to think.
My eyes start to close,
while I drift into a deep sleep.
You come back,
I hear your feet on the carpet.
You plop down on the couch,
which wakes me from my slumber.
You lean towards me and give me a peck on the cheek,
I love you I say.
"I love you too."
So I'm just trying to tell you I'll love you forever and more.
with my head thrown back.
I sigh with contentment,
from the scene thats before me.
You and Me..
You sit there next to me,
holding my hand.
I look up at you,
and smile.
You look down and smile back.
You get up,
and leave me to think.
My eyes start to close,
while I drift into a deep sleep.
You come back,
I hear your feet on the carpet.
You plop down on the couch,
which wakes me from my slumber.
You lean towards me and give me a peck on the cheek,
I love you I say.
"I love you too."
So I'm just trying to tell you I'll love you forever and more.
Blood
The smell catches my nose,
That sends me on a jagged path.
The taste enters my mouth,
And I can't stop from tasting until no more.
The look of it makes my mouth water,
The sweet red mist pours out.
The only word you can say to stop me is,
I love you.
It drowns out the blood,
The only thing I listen to.
Your mouth opens,
"I love you", you say through the pain.
I stop right on the path,
And instead of finishing the last of you,
I save your life for mine.
That sends me on a jagged path.
The taste enters my mouth,
And I can't stop from tasting until no more.
The look of it makes my mouth water,
The sweet red mist pours out.
The only word you can say to stop me is,
I love you.
It drowns out the blood,
The only thing I listen to.
Your mouth opens,
"I love you", you say through the pain.
I stop right on the path,
And instead of finishing the last of you,
I save your life for mine.
Should I?
Should I be afraid?
Of you behind the mask?
Should I be afraid?
Please just come and tell me the truth,
The truth that will dissolve the lies.
The lies that are the breaking relationship between us,
Our relationship that is on the last string.
Just open up your mouth and tell me.
Am I not worth your time?
Just come back to me,
with your true colors shining.
I put up a fake smile,
while the hatred wells up inside.
Please is the only word I can say,
while I am drowning in my own blood.
Of you behind the mask?
Should I be afraid?
Please just come and tell me the truth,
The truth that will dissolve the lies.
The lies that are the breaking relationship between us,
Our relationship that is on the last string.
Just open up your mouth and tell me.
Am I not worth your time?
Just come back to me,
with your true colors shining.
I put up a fake smile,
while the hatred wells up inside.
Please is the only word I can say,
while I am drowning in my own blood.
Open Book
I am an open book as you say,
everyone peels out the thoughts of what I am.
They look deeper into my eyes,
and find untold secrets.
They tear and take everything in reach,
until there is no more to be looked upon.
The source of it is the beholder behind the mask,
they keep fighting and coming back for more.
I feel their stares behind my back,
their gossip that laces their lips.
But should I give into it and tell them what they want to hear?
All the lies they put me up to,
no more room for truth.
Even though they mistake them for lies,
I fight back until the open book leaves.
everyone peels out the thoughts of what I am.
They look deeper into my eyes,
and find untold secrets.
They tear and take everything in reach,
until there is no more to be looked upon.
The source of it is the beholder behind the mask,
they keep fighting and coming back for more.
I feel their stares behind my back,
their gossip that laces their lips.
But should I give into it and tell them what they want to hear?
All the lies they put me up to,
no more room for truth.
Even though they mistake them for lies,
I fight back until the open book leaves.
Me
Just let me be myself,
forced in a fake smile.
Let me shed these feelings,
Of those of me within.
Let me be who I want to be,
not who you trapped and took from me.
Let me close my eyes and be free,
until the core of my heart wears off.
Let me be me,
just a little expression of who I thought I was.
Not you, or who you took and kidnapped,
laced along my lips is the truth.
Not far behind.
forced in a fake smile.
Let me shed these feelings,
Of those of me within.
Let me be who I want to be,
not who you trapped and took from me.
Let me close my eyes and be free,
until the core of my heart wears off.
Let me be me,
just a little expression of who I thought I was.
Not you, or who you took and kidnapped,
laced along my lips is the truth.
Not far behind.
Waiting
I sit and wait until time grows shorter.
The days feel longer and the nights littler.
I wait for a day that feels long gone.
Until I will be able to see you again.
But, for now, I wait and do nothing but that.
Still weeks from now.
Time has hardly passed it seems.
Until I come and see you face to face.
The days feel longer and the nights littler.
I wait for a day that feels long gone.
Until I will be able to see you again.
But, for now, I wait and do nothing but that.
Still weeks from now.
Time has hardly passed it seems.
Until I come and see you face to face.
Forgotten
I sit on the stairs,
with my head propped in my hands.
The tears keep teasing me,
and come back for more.
They stain my cheeks,
the smell of salt in the air.
My eyes are stinging,
red from no sleep.
I'm abandoned, left alone,
on a stair case.
You took him,
and left me.
The walls are falling apart,
the windows shattered.
The doorway is blocked,
from rocks that keep falling down.
The roof is busted,
water leaks above, drowning out the tears.
The tornado is long gone,
and so are you.
The only one in visible sight,
the only one still alive.
My hand starts to shake,
for I am crying yet again.
I get up, weak from exhaustion,
my mouth peels open from dehidration.
I lift my open mouth to one of the leaking spots,
the single drop that enters my mouth.
The only thing I have left is my memory,
no pictures are left of you, not even a drawing.
I mourn for you,
but nothing is left to do.
So I wait and wait and wait,
until you come and take me with you.
with my head propped in my hands.
The tears keep teasing me,
and come back for more.
They stain my cheeks,
the smell of salt in the air.
My eyes are stinging,
red from no sleep.
I'm abandoned, left alone,
on a stair case.
You took him,
and left me.
The walls are falling apart,
the windows shattered.
The doorway is blocked,
from rocks that keep falling down.
The roof is busted,
water leaks above, drowning out the tears.
The tornado is long gone,
and so are you.
The only one in visible sight,
the only one still alive.
My hand starts to shake,
for I am crying yet again.
I get up, weak from exhaustion,
my mouth peels open from dehidration.
I lift my open mouth to one of the leaking spots,
the single drop that enters my mouth.
The only thing I have left is my memory,
no pictures are left of you, not even a drawing.
I mourn for you,
but nothing is left to do.
So I wait and wait and wait,
until you come and take me with you.
Tuesday, May 5, 2009
Please
I followed you with curious eyes,
not knowing about the surprise.
I look and glare,
while you invite me with a stare.
Will this ever be the same again?
or will it just want to begin?
Is it the fact that you want to win,
the part of your heart made of tin.
Just restart, replay, and redo.
While I sit and watch until you do.
not knowing about the surprise.
I look and glare,
while you invite me with a stare.
Will this ever be the same again?
or will it just want to begin?
Is it the fact that you want to win,
the part of your heart made of tin.
Just restart, replay, and redo.
While I sit and watch until you do.
Monday, April 20, 2009
What are we her for?
What are we?
Are we merely just here to live?
For what?
Are we here to just do nothing?
Are we just destroyers of what we live on?
Do we just kill off planets one by one?
What is our purpose to live for?
Do we just kill off what we started?
We should give back what we take.
Share the opportunity of life.
Are we merely just here to live?
For what?
Are we here to just do nothing?
Are we just destroyers of what we live on?
Do we just kill off planets one by one?
What is our purpose to live for?
Do we just kill off what we started?
We should give back what we take.
Share the opportunity of life.
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Easter
Today my family and I colored eggs.
We put confetti in them.
That's what me and my family do.
On easter we crack open the confetti eggs on eachothers heads!!
hahahaahhaaha
We put confetti in them.
That's what me and my family do.
On easter we crack open the confetti eggs on eachothers heads!!
hahahaahhaaha
Free Falling
Wednesday, April 8, 2009
Situated
You walk with a grudge,
Down the hall you trudge.
You stare back at me,
I try to flee.
What happened to us?
Now you always just fuss.
Have you lost your mind?
Are you unalligned?
Down the hall you trudge.
You stare back at me,
I try to flee.
What happened to us?
Now you always just fuss.
Have you lost your mind?
Are you unalligned?
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Edge of Denial
The lies you hid from me,
made you so slick.
The things you said to me,
made me shudder for myself.
The hurt you put me through,
made all the possible turn to dust.
The relief you left me in when it was over,
made you fall in the edge of denial.
made you so slick.
The things you said to me,
made me shudder for myself.
The hurt you put me through,
made all the possible turn to dust.
The relief you left me in when it was over,
made you fall in the edge of denial.
13 Reasons Why
I thought I was saving you,
but it turned out I was doing just the opposite.
I pushed you closer and closer to your death,
falling off the edge of insanity.
Couldn't take it any more,
so you decided for everything to stop.
You crushed me to the point where I couldn't take it,
So, why I ask you.... Why would you do it to us?
Take away your life to make it better for you?
I thought I could help you,
but you pulled away from me.
One last hope wouldn't change your mind either,
You were set and ready to go.
You just let go and relaxed for what was to come.....
By By......Hannah. :(
but it turned out I was doing just the opposite.
I pushed you closer and closer to your death,
falling off the edge of insanity.
Couldn't take it any more,
so you decided for everything to stop.
You crushed me to the point where I couldn't take it,
So, why I ask you.... Why would you do it to us?
Take away your life to make it better for you?
I thought I could help you,
but you pulled away from me.
One last hope wouldn't change your mind either,
You were set and ready to go.
You just let go and relaxed for what was to come.....
By By......Hannah. :(
Monday, March 30, 2009
funny
When it's raining outside, and there is only one umbrella,
a good friend would share it with you,
but a best friend would take it and say, "Run bitch run!!!!!"
:D
a good friend would share it with you,
but a best friend would take it and say, "Run bitch run!!!!!"
:D
Saturday, March 28, 2009
Stop pretending your all that.
The lies you throw out are catching up.
Enemies are one step behind you,
Chewing the path that you lay.
"Eat my dust!" you say,
But those words are true to those behind you.
A minute past and you drown in all of those lies,
Your sworn enemies see past your disguise.
You lay there, unspoken
For you are paralyzed for what has come
Your mind tries to steer you to the path once again,
But you decide to walk a different path.
You now have actual friends instead of _your_ so called "friends"
Now you tell the lies, "Eat my dust!"
They have a long way to come
So your on your own now without those lies.
The lies you throw out are catching up.
Enemies are one step behind you,
Chewing the path that you lay.
"Eat my dust!" you say,
But those words are true to those behind you.
A minute past and you drown in all of those lies,
Your sworn enemies see past your disguise.
You lay there, unspoken
For you are paralyzed for what has come
Your mind tries to steer you to the path once again,
But you decide to walk a different path.
You now have actual friends instead of _your_ so called "friends"
Now you tell the lies, "Eat my dust!"
They have a long way to come
So your on your own now without those lies.
Isabella
I went to a baby shower today.
My dad's, friend's wife is having a baby girl!
Her name is gonna be Isabella!
The best of luck to them!! <3
My dad's, friend's wife is having a baby girl!
Her name is gonna be Isabella!
The best of luck to them!! <3
Friday, March 20, 2009
Thursday, March 19, 2009
Mine
What once was, isn't any more.
What once was...
Holding my hand, with laughter and joy.
Soft kisses every week.
Then...
There was that one single person.
That one single girl that stood out from the rest.
Always staring at you, with those fake eyes.
I stole a look in the hall.
You and her were there.
Laughing and giggling.
Soft kisses just like you gave me.
A bubble of fear and anger went through me,
Tears started pouring down my cheeks.
I fleed from the scene before it got worse.
Acting as if nothing happened a few hours ago,
You come out and grab a hold of my hand!
I pulled away from you,
you having a confused look.
I just gave him a wicked smile and walked away from him..
Saw you in the hall again.
Saw you watching what once was for me.
That girl giggling with someone else.
Soft kisses just like he gave her and me.
He turned aroung,
With shock and misery on his face,
He gasped at me and fell in my arms.
Nothing I could do but comfort him.
Now what once was, never happened.
You are mine and I am yours.
What once was...
Holding my hand, with laughter and joy.
Soft kisses every week.
Then...
There was that one single person.
That one single girl that stood out from the rest.
Always staring at you, with those fake eyes.
I stole a look in the hall.
You and her were there.
Laughing and giggling.
Soft kisses just like you gave me.
A bubble of fear and anger went through me,
Tears started pouring down my cheeks.
I fleed from the scene before it got worse.
Acting as if nothing happened a few hours ago,
You come out and grab a hold of my hand!
I pulled away from you,
you having a confused look.
I just gave him a wicked smile and walked away from him..
Saw you in the hall again.
Saw you watching what once was for me.
That girl giggling with someone else.
Soft kisses just like he gave her and me.
He turned aroung,
With shock and misery on his face,
He gasped at me and fell in my arms.
Nothing I could do but comfort him.
Now what once was, never happened.
You are mine and I am yours.
Mine
I thought you were mine,
but after a while you lost time.
I miss your smiles and hugs,
now you just nag and bug.
The way you look up at me,
makes me want to flee.
the rage in your eyes,
makes me want to die.
I see you...
holding someone else's hand,
I feel worthless and banned.
A tear of not hurt,
but anger rose up in my eye,
you thought you were so sly .
But, now I found someone else.
I am not yours and you are not mine.
Someone that loves me is close by.
Now it's you that looks at me, shy
but after a while you lost time.
I miss your smiles and hugs,
now you just nag and bug.
The way you look up at me,
makes me want to flee.
the rage in your eyes,
makes me want to die.
I see you...
holding someone else's hand,
I feel worthless and banned.
A tear of not hurt,
but anger rose up in my eye,
you thought you were so sly .
But, now I found someone else.
I am not yours and you are not mine.
Someone that loves me is close by.
Now it's you that looks at me, shy
Today/Tomorrow/Future/Past!
Today might be today,
but tomorrow will be the future,
and the future will be part of the past,
and the past wil be part of today.
but tomorrow will be the future,
and the future will be part of the past,
and the past wil be part of today.
Future
Hidden beneath the eyes of a hero,
Untamed logic reaches out to the mind,
Black pools for a disaterous mask.
Shadows of horror strike the night,
Voices slither down your spinal cord,
Burden by burden times goes by,
as we live in fear of the near future.
Untamed logic reaches out to the mind,
Black pools for a disaterous mask.
Shadows of horror strike the night,
Voices slither down your spinal cord,
Burden by burden times goes by,
as we live in fear of the near future.
Policy to the World!
Voices restricting policies to keep control,
"Make it a better place!"
Lies in those words are seeking to come out,
"Our religion is best!"
Some people fighting for their lives,
while people beat them with words.
"The law clearly states....!"
Believing in the wrong person is wrong to yourself.
"Judge, Judge, Judge!!"
Looking to the "one in charge" for answers will do no good.
Fakeness spresds in the room,
to conquer the truth.
Insanely policies turn to dust in a million years to come....
"Make it a better place!"
Lies in those words are seeking to come out,
"Our religion is best!"
Some people fighting for their lives,
while people beat them with words.
"The law clearly states....!"
Believing in the wrong person is wrong to yourself.
"Judge, Judge, Judge!!"
Looking to the "one in charge" for answers will do no good.
Fakeness spresds in the room,
to conquer the truth.
Insanely policies turn to dust in a million years to come....
Tuesday, March 17, 2009
Grass
A million words unseen,
The sunlights eye, like crystals.
Different shades of emotion,
Saturn's green swirls.
The sunlights eye, like crystals.
Different shades of emotion,
Saturn's green swirls.
Stars
A maze of unknown peace,
One single dot is a word unspoken.
Hidden wonders beneath the shadows,
Reflected out towards the sun.
Gleaming eyes stare at you until dawn
One single dot is a word unspoken.
Hidden wonders beneath the shadows,
Reflected out towards the sun.
Gleaming eyes stare at you until dawn
Maze
My life is a maze,
Every corner I turn,
There is another twist.
Entangled in its own mess,
Blocked by a web of thoughts.
Every mistake is yet but another turn.
Until the opening,
I'm living all my lies...
Every corner I turn,
There is another twist.
Entangled in its own mess,
Blocked by a web of thoughts.
Every mistake is yet but another turn.
Until the opening,
I'm living all my lies...
Blindness
The rain stains my face. My hair like a wet mop. I'm walking alone. Nothing but shadows all around me. The road of broken dreams awaits me. Up ahead a faint light shines like an angel. It comes fast. It's so close that you can feel the heat off the light. In a flash, my heart stops. Coldness engulfs me. I fall to the stone floor. Dirt engraved into my face. A loud screech falls into the night. I hear footsteps coming toward me. A loud scream of terror drowns out the blood.
I'm dead. Quietness of nothing surrounds me....
I'm dead. Quietness of nothing surrounds me....
Friday, March 13, 2009
Fallen Heart
No one can buy the way you lie,
Present yourself with fear to your peer,
No way to sell the way you fell,
Hide the freak within the week,
To redo that part you need a heart,
The way your bad gets me mad,
The scream that knocks pulls at the seem,
Damn it, just get into habit!
Present yourself with fear to your peer,
No way to sell the way you fell,
Hide the freak within the week,
To redo that part you need a heart,
The way your bad gets me mad,
The scream that knocks pulls at the seem,
Damn it, just get into habit!
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